HOW I CAME TO WHERE I AM TODAY...
If you don’t know me from a bar of soap, you’ll know me for my psychedelic 60’s name – a print resembling a twisted teardrop – adorned by those who made love - not war and ruled the hippie zeitgeist with flower power.
I am as my name suggests; a wild child who lives life with colour and sparkle, rich in ideas and loud with laughter. I love to feel all the feels – the highs and the lows – and move through life like a revolutionist on a quest for spiritual freedom.
For most of my life, I’ve been told I was born in the wrong era. An "old soul", "wise beyond my years", dribbling existential conversations since I was a child– I started to wonder if there was something wrong – is it me? Or is it them?
Why was I here? Back here…again. What was it this time? How could I I leave? Why should I stay? What was the meaning of this emotional mess of a human experience?
Fed up with fairy tales, I started my mission as a Truth Seeker.
Fortunately for me – I picked my parents right!
My mother is a florist and my father an engineer. With incredibly open minds and hearts, they supported me every step of the way without judgment or hesitation, as I began my journey to make sense of the world.
So off I went...
Around age five, I started my investigation into religion.
I knew God had something to do with creation, with ALL of it - so I signed up for a life of Catholic devotion. In the years that followed, my family was convinced I’d become a nun. I loved Jesus…he was probably my first real crush. I spent afternoons praying outside in the sunshine and making prayer cards for my bedside alter.
Around age 11, my prayers turned to silence and stillness. I began to direct my attention to Lord Buddha. I sat for hours under our lemon tree, afternoons baking on trampoline and evenings in my bedroom with the lights out and candles lit in meditation.
"...don’t call me for dinner mum, I’m meditating and I don’t know when I’ll be back.”
Buddha and Jesus became my idols, my only connection to enlightenment. I needed to know – what did it feel like to be in Heaven, to be in Nirvana.
Fast forward to age 15.
Puberty hit like a storm in Summer and before I knew it, I’d completely lost myself to boys and parties. Long story short - I graduated high school, had my first heartbreak, worked a tonne of different jobs (floristry, teaching deportment & grooming at Chadwick models, night club door-girl, hospitality, retail, Undergraduate Tutor at UWA, house/pet sitting, Corporate marketing...), I finished a double degree, became President of Perth's oldest children's charity Uni Camp For Kids, travelled the world (Europe, Asia, Africa, USA...), started my own business consulting in social media marketing and even ran a marathon!
**Insert breath here**
Everything should’ve been peachy…but still, something was missing. I felt agitated, frustrated and bored. I had achieved so many things yet I felt somewhat unaccomplished.
And there it was -that soft, gentle voice within questioning the meaning of life...asking me to 'go deeper, look deeper, look within'.
In 2014 at age 22, I found myself sitting in front of Melaney Ryan from the Australian StillPoint Institute studying Mahat Mediation level 1.
WOW. BRAIN OVERLOAD. Ask and you shall receive.
Seeds were planted and the flowers bloomed faster than I could pick. I had answers to questions I'd chased my entire life. Wisdom poured into my soul - a feeling that cannot be written in words. The Flower Power was back. Out came the 60’s revolutionist, the dreams of greatness, the girl with the glow, the kid with faith and belief beyond measure.
Oh.em.gee there it was. The missing piece. The thing I couldn’t find or feel – I was back baby!
Forever a student, I studied hard again - Mahat Meditation level 1, 2 and 3. A stickler for discipline, I meditated daily, sometimes for hours on end. I expanded my mind, shifted my paradigm and became a practitioner of Integrated Therapeutic Alignment (ITA) Energy Medicine.
As I rediscovered positive aspects within myself they began to project into my external world.
My life filled with beautiful, inspirational, ambitious, passionate like-minded friends. The sort of soul connections that challenge you to live true – my tribe – the people who truly meet me eye-to-eye.
In March 2017 whilst on Mahat Meditation retreat in Chiang Mai – I saw my life flash before my eyes. Like something that happens before you die, but completely awake and present. A collation of significant memories of my 25 years to date overlapping each other all at once…leaving me with one realisation.
My life has come full circle – everything I need, I already have. My intuition was peaking and I knew there was no turning back. I felt as though a shedding process had begun! People, clients, jobs… you get the point.
The following year, July 23 2018, I lost my brother, Jesse, to suicide at the young age of 28. Absolutely heart-broken by the experience, I was deeply grateful for the training and discipline I had given to my meditation and ITA Energy Medicine practice. With my feet on the ground and my heart in my hand - I knew it was time to take action - a brave leap forward in the direction of my dreams.
I finally began to understand my place within consciousness and my gift back became clear.